??? WHY ???

Why can't I get motivated again?
Why can't I get back into the exercise routine?
Why do I eat the things that I am not suppose too?
Why do I get started the right way and then after a few days I screw it up again?
Why do I feel like I have NO self control?
Why doesn't my husband understand??
Why do I eat compulsively?
Why am I so unhappy with myself and yet, I don't do anything about it?
Why do I buy the foods that are healthy and good for me, yet I don't eat them and them end up going bad?
Why do I have such good intentions but never follow through?
Why don't I care enough about myself to get into shape?
Why don't I care enough about my family to get healthy for them?
Why do I get on my hubby for not taking his blood pressure meds and taking care of his health, when I am not doing it either?
Why am I not scared to death because of all the medical problems that I am exposing myself to by not getting in shape?
Why do I feel so alone in this struggle?
Why can I not stay committed?
Why has it not clicked that I need to loose weight?
Why is my head not helping me?
Why does my mind allow me to eat the foods that my stomach tells me that I don't need?
Why do I eat when I am not hungry?
Why do I not use my treadmill that I had to have?
Why do I not exercise with the videos that I have?
Why do I let food control my life?
Why do I go to the grocery store and buy the bad foods? My kids don't need that junk either.
Why do I eat the snacks that are for my kids?
Why do I hide food from my family?
Why can't I just have one piece or one serving?
Why do I have to eat it all?
Why do I feel so bad after I eat more than I should?
Why do I not care that I hate the way I look in the mirror?
Why do I not care that my clothes are getting too tight?
Why do I not care that my husband deserves a wife that looks better and cares more for herself?
Why does it feel like "me" is lost in all this fat?
Why don't I know what is causing me to self destruct?
Why don't I try harder?
Why don't I want to exercise?
Why don't I want to get into shape?
Why can't I maintain a food journal?
Why do I join a gym and not go?
Why do I make up excuses?
Why don't I care that I can't play with my kids outside without getting tired?

WHY??????????